Q. 9. Why do liberals like you, Al Franken, hate America?
A. Liberals like me love America. We just love America in a different way. You love America like a 4‑year-old loves his mommy. Liberals love America like grown-ups. To a 4‑year-old, everything Mommy does is wonderful and anyone who criticizes Mommy is bad. Grown-up love means actually understanding what you love, taking the good with the bad and helping your loved one grow. Love takes attention and work and is the best thing in the world. That’s why we liberals want America to do the right thing. We know America is the hope of the world, and we love it and want it to do well. We also want it to do good.